| | it takes me a while to figure out how to use the new xanga...
yea,,, new,,,, because i haven;t used it for such a long long time~~~
I have to write it down here, dun want too many people to know my sadness on facebook.......
I am having an emotional breakdown...
I am emotionally so fragile to a point that I can fill my eyes with tears any single moment...
I dunno why I am so sad...
Possible reason
1. I cry nearly for an hour last night because of someone
I care about someone when I booked any flight, she said she want to wait for another girl,
but tell her there is only 2 places left, and asked her to make a choice
end up she buy the tickets for her and another girl,
I can (1) pay US$200 more or (2) travel 2.5 by bus to the nearby city, then leave from there
I choose (2), just not want to spend so much money....
the whole things is not about my departure time and money,
it;s an accumulated thing between me and one girl...
I am just so silly,,,, dunno why when i loved and care about someone, I will demand for the same level of love and care back... silly, silly, silly
2. i will miss my friends here. have nearly 0% of chance to see them...
can't believe i am feel a bonding with my two suitemates here so soon....
they are soooooooo nice... being barely ever have the chance to see them makes me really, really sad....
i just cannot talk to them today... i cry immediately before i start talking....
3. i dun want to face the reality back home
year 2 summer... really in need of an intern that i want... pressure of the gloomy economy...
i dun want to graduate
i have to take summer course to pull up my CGA... I am losing my scholarship... again no a matter of money... but a matter of effort that i have put in... ashame of myself
I am a judgement person, i love to have everything planned, i.e. my after sem travel plan is planned at least 2 months ago...
Now SUDDENLY ask me to
1. cancel the trip
2. search for a new flight ticket home
3. suddenly dun have time to say goodbye to friends here
4. suddenly have an additional exam tmr
i just can't take it...
i get sick after crying so much yesterday...
i know people won;t believe it...
i got skin allergy everytime i cry really hard...
my body defect will not work when i am SAD...
Ignore my whole entry please...
i will be perfectly fine when i arrive home...
just being silly and a cry baby today...
P.S. When I read this 5 years later,
I will laugh at myself, saying "How come I am so stupid when I am 21?"
hahhahah
life must go on,
i know =)
i just need time to take the fact*
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| | Posted 5/4/2009 11:47 AM - 3 Views
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